Monday, February 9, 2015

...I Will Not Vote for You

It's very early to be thinking about the elections of November, 2016, but I already have some firm ideas. I don't know who I'll be voting for. But I know who I won't be.

If you have ever made a ridiculous statement about rape, including that raped women don't get pregnant, or that babies are sometimes created by rape by God to turn a traumatic experience into a blessing, I will not be voting for you. (For heaven's sake--even the Catholic church permits D & Cs following rape.)

If you ever answered a question about how you would handle your wife's hypothetical rape, and your answer was anything other than, "Love and support her to the best of my ability, and probably seek counseling," I will not be voting for you.

If you believe that abortion rights are the number one issue the federal government should address, I will not be voting for you. I am as pro-life as anyone, but please. The ship has sailed.

If you believe that the only duty a pro-life person has is to support the overturning of Roe v. Wade, I will not be voting for you.

If you are anti-vaccine, I will not be voting for you.

If you do not believe in evolution, I will not be voting for you.

If you adhere to the idea of "prosperity gospel," I will not be voting for you.

If you believe in complementarian marriage, I will not be voting for you.

If you are against marriage equality, and especially if you have ever said in public, "It's Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve," I will not be voting for you.

If you think that I personally don't pay my "fair share" of taxes, I will show you the cancelled checks I've written to the federal government, but I will not be voting for you.

If you refuse to believe that Thomas Jefferson never had sex with Sally Hemmings because our Founding Fathers wouldn't participate in racial mixing, I will not vote for you.

If you believe that a white person having sex with a black person is somehow worse than a white person owning a black person, I will not vote for you.

If you believe slavery only existed in the distant past, and does not need to be addressed today, I will not vote for you.

If you state that America was founded by God instead of by humans looking for religious freedom, or if you fail in any way to support the separation of church and state, I will not be voting for you.

If you think the answer to all societal problems can be solved by Big Government, I will not vote for you.

Conversely, if you think the poor in society do not need safety nets and should all just "get a job," I will not be voting for you.

If you show contempt for your voters, you can't have my vote.

If you spout sound bites instead of policy, and care more about your hair style than the truth, I plan to ignore you entirely.

So I need to find a candidate that I can vote for. Who's left? Anyone?